Inlaws or Outlaws?

Poor baby girl calls me, and I can literally hear the stress in her voice. She, and her fiance were having dinner with her future mother-in-law (MIL) who asked them when they plan on buying a house. The future “MIL” then asked if they considered buying a place with a mother-in-law apartment on the property so she could sell her condo, and live there six months out of the year. I was pretty sure we would have to go over to our daughter’s apartment to sedate her after that conversation.

This was not the first time “MIL” has brought this subject up which really has our daughter more agitated than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. Keep in mind our daughter was the type of little girl who sent her friend’s home after a couple of hours exclaiming that was enough bonding time for her.Our little Virgo enjoys her friendships, but she enjoys her space a bit more.Given the opportunity she would screen her future children to make sure they were suitable housemates. 😉

When I asked baby girl what she did the first time “MIL” brought this subject up she said she nervously laughed it off as a joke. This time she told us she immediately felt a sharp stabbing pain in her head. “MIL” is still a fairly young woman in her early fifties. Her health is good so for the life of me I can not imagine how she could possibly think that a young newly wed couple starting out would want to have their “MIL” living with them. Then again this is the same woman who invited herself to their Valentine’s dinner a couple of years before.

Did I also mention this is the same Mom who repeatedly told her son he needed to get a place of his own when he lived at home with her? When our daughter asked me what she should do I told her to talk to her fiance. The conversation went something like this- “My parents are not living with us, and your Mother is not living with us.” I then suggested that maybe she could have been a bit more delicate about the subject. her reply to me was “Oh Mom  if I am too subtle about this I might roll over in bed, and find her sleeping in the middle of us!”  My reply-“Duly noted” 😉


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  1. #1 by Jay on August 4, 2015 - 7:51 pm

    Wow, that’s tough.I definitely agree that the fiance needs to be firm with his mother on this!

    • #2 by idioglossiablog on August 5, 2015 - 11:41 am

      I agree, and I don’t envy his predicament. He is a great guy with a huge heart.

  2. #3 by The Champa Tree on August 5, 2015 - 3:16 am

    This sounds so ‘Indian’..Argh..

    • #4 by idioglossiablog on August 5, 2015 - 11:39 am

      🙂 A most difficult situation. What I find to be so interesting is that the “MIL” has a mother who is still living, and she feels an aversion to living with her own mother who could benefit from some help. G-uno

  3. #7 by Ellen Hawley on August 11, 2015 - 4:37 pm

    Roll over in bed and find her sleeping in the middle? Your girls’s got a way with words, doesn’t she?

    • #8 by idioglossiablog on August 11, 2015 - 10:07 pm

      Oh Ellen she is one of my most favorite people to have a conversation with in this life. 😉 G-uno

  4. #10 by g2 on September 2, 2015 - 3:27 pm

    I laugh at this, because I’m thinking had this been Spawn in (hopefully… at least) a dozen or more years, I would have the opposite problem of kicking Spawn out to go to their own spouse.

    Though I find it funny Spawn is a Taurus and is the exact same way about people. The one time they have had a sleepover, she crawled out of bed when our visitors had FINALLY settled down to sleep and said “I’m ready for them to go home now.” Its been years since anyone else has been invited.

    • #11 by idioglossiablog on September 2, 2015 - 3:41 pm

      Our daughters have mastered something that takes a lot of other people years to master, enjoying your own company. 😉 G-uno

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