The Depths Of Sexual Intensity (G-uno)

My husband’s boss has been married four times, and is currently having an affair with another woman. His big question for my husband was how can you only sleep with just one woman? Monogamy is actually the easiest part of being married for both my husband, and myself. I think the fact that we have always had a strong sexual connection has a great deal to do with this. Combine that chemistry with over three decades of friendship, and the fact that we both know that the other would walk away without ever looking back are also major contributing factors.

I liked my husband’s answer the best. He told his boss that the idea of losing our relationship, or hurting me that deeply was just not something he wanted to risk. I couldn’t have defined that any better. What his boss perceives as boring is the very part that brings us deep excitement. The bond of knowing that someone is committed to you that deeply is highly erotic. To understand how to touch another person in the exact way that their body is incapable of controlling its own passion is a form of expression that has no comparison.

I think it also helps to have the understanding that infidelity can happen to anyone at anytime. No couple is exempt from this possibility. This concept helps you not to take the other person for granted. I find my husband to be extremely attractive. I make it a point to make sure he knows that I feel this way, and he does the same for me. Complacency is the enemy. I know sometimes your just exhausted from the demands of our everyday lives, and it’s not always possible to make grand gestures. I also think that it’s the smaller more subtle gestures that can be equally as powerful. Something as simple as curling up next to your person, holding them close while reminding them how much better life is because you can end your day with them beside you.

I think every relationship has its own unique bond, but I do believe there are some commonalities that we all share in discovering the depths of sexual intensity. Listen without making assumptions, always touch each other as much as possible, stick to your agreements, try new things, be truthful, use direct eye contact when you talk to one another, and always choose love over ego.


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  1. #1 by Meredith at My Pink Champagne Life on August 10, 2015 - 6:58 pm

    Complacency is the enemy-such true words!! Thanks for this post, nailed it!

  2. #2 by g2 on September 2, 2015 - 3:47 pm

    You know, I think we have gone to be such a “me” society. I highly doubt his boss could answer highly intimate details about any of his former spouses, spouse or girlfriend. He wouldn’t care, they only matter in what they offer him.

    During the brief period I was married, I was almost always working on the background thought of “would this enhance my person’s life? Would they like this? Would this make them smile?” You notice when their skin doesn’t look as healthy, a bad mood is coming, when to get close and when to pull back.

    Problem was, that was my ex’s main concern too. Their well-being, their happiness, wanting and demanding more affection, but in turn giving criticisms and cuts-downs to manipulate more out of me. Apparently, if I was defensive, I was trying to prove them wrong… which was the goal, I guess.

    I had always suspected that if you find someone you want to make happy, and they are concerned with yours as well… then it works.

    Over that short time, I admit I was the one in control when it came to the bedroom. If it lasted 5 minutes or 3 hours, it was by my will. I knew the points, I knew the spots… they just didn’t know any of mine. After a while, when asked “what do you want from me?!” my immediate unedited response was “your absence.”

  3. #3 by idioglossiablog on September 2, 2015 - 4:06 pm

    I think the boss has low self esteem. He needs the constant gratification of the way someone regards you at the beginning of a relationship when everything is all shiny, and new. That validation seems to be more of a driving force than the sex. You on the other hand had a selfish, and lazy spouse! G-uno

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