He use to always be so comfortable around me. Then one day all the comfort disappeared, it was replaced with an uncomfortable nervousness. I could see in his eyes that he still loved me, but now there was no eye contact, it had been replaced by a look of shame.
He use to love to come to our home, but now he stays away. He had the look of someone filled with guilt. I probably would have never known why if we both hadn’t of run into each other at the long-term facility so often. He is my loved ones brother.
The male in-laws in our family are not as caddy as the women. Kinder, more willing to give getting to know you a chance. The women are more clanish, passive aggressive. My sister-in-law is the worst. A funny thing happens whenever she has spent time with someone in the family who likes me. They suddenly have a change of heart.
I am smart enough to know this, but I refuse to chase after someone who believes what someone else says about another person without asking them their side of things. Also if someone can change someone else’s opinion of you with such ease, then there’s really no point to trying to reverse their opinion. People believe what they want to believe.
Then one day as we stood face to face at the sign out desk of the long-term facility. I was leaving, as he was coming. I hugged him, and we joked about my MIL being annoyed with me again. Then his whole facial expression changed, he looked down at his feet then back up to my eyes.
With the saddest look he said “You really can’t catch a break can you.” It was a knowing statement, not a question. I searched his eyes. I could see he felt badly for knowing about all the negative crap his nieces, and sisters say about me.
Maybe he felt guilty for listening, or even worse not standing up for me. So I replied “Don’t worry I know, but please keep in mind that while they are all trashing me I am here everyday by their father, and your brother’s side.” 😉