how the hell did i spend that much money on a holiday i get no credit for? (g2)

Anyone else notice it’s Christmas? yeah… you can ignore it? Shut up, I’m not talking to you since I don’t get that luxury.

Those of us with children in the Santa range, it’s the time of year when you have to juggle sanity with the intense desire to make the MOST PERFECT FUCKING CHRISTMAS EVER!!!!!!!!

Which means you spend WAY more than you should.

Always.

Every.single.fucking.year.

I use a revolving credit line for Spawn’s xmas every year. No seriously, I do. I exploit those 6 months 0% things and they exploit me by raising my credit line.

This year was no different, in fact my hunger to buy was worse than it’s ever been. Spawn is at that age where gadgets are king and…. I … LOVE… GADGETS!

After 6 years of being on the list, a particular gaming console came up as the centerpiece this year because I talked to the two console junkies I know and they both said this one was best if you liked supporting indie games. Considering 99.9% of the reason Spawn wanted the console was for one particular indie game, it won. An open box sale later, and it’s done.

Spawn has also been getting heavy into instruments. At school, they take cello, a guitar the last two years through camp and now they have been trying to teach themselves piano (and Japanese) from their phone. I’m not sure if this instrument addiction is channeling their inner me or if maybe they want to see if they can learn more instruments than I did (5, if you want to know).

Considering Spawn rejected the idea of learning German like me, I’m guessing it’s just the prior. Fine then, see if i’m going to stop cussing if I can do it in a language they don’t understand!!!

I don’t know why i seem to go crazy this time of year. Perhaps I’m getting possessed by both of Spawn’s dead grandmothers. Perhaps it’s guilt over the ones passed away or that I’m an only child, or for having such a bad connection with the little family I do have.

I’m not like this on birthdays, in fact Spawn point blank would not give me any idea of anything they wanted for their birthday this past year, so they didn’t get much of anything. I’ve used that too as justification for my spending bullshit.

It actually took me forcing Spawn to a table and we brainstormed their Santa list this year, but it wasn’t until I forced them to do it.

I used to have a 10 item limit when Spawn would list lame shit like “pens” or “paper”. The last three or four items were almost always buzzwords they heard at daycare. Now they are older this has decreased to 5. They are more able to understand the concept of a wish list and it also keeps them from going crazy. Though Spawn still lists lame shit. When “drafting/art table” hit the wish list one year, Spawn made sure to list the stool upon which to sit at it separately.

Almost every year too, regardless of anything on Spawn’s list, it is generally some lame BS item that I tossed in as an afterthought that Spawn just ends up going nuts over. Or if BFH sends something, I’ve been upstaged by the godparent more than I will admit.

Ok dish, what’s been the worst you’ve ever done for the holiday?

I think I might be hitting about 500+. It may be worse and I’m just forgetting, but that would cover the bulk. I use to try to keep it around 250 or less. I get for some of you that may not seem like a lot but understand I’m a single parent, that changes a lot. Christmas used to his 1k easy when I was married, and that was with no kids. For some of you, it may seem insane I would spend so much, and to you I say… when can you move in and start budgeting my shit?

I hated the Fat man getting more credit than I did on birthdays. I’m losing bad now though.

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  1. #1 by idioglossiablog on December 14, 2015 - 10:32 pm

    You absolutely rock! Merry Christmas to you both! G-uno

  2. #2 by Rita on December 15, 2015 - 4:50 am

    Oh dear! I’d move in and budget but I seem to suffer from the same “it has to be the best one ever” syndrome over here. Maybe we should fly to an uninhabited island and wait out the jingle bells . . .

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